Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Spoiler Alert: Good Neighbours

Furrowed brows. Beard. Red plaid shirt. Also, Scott Speedman.

I was really looking forward to watching Good Neighbours this week (yes, Canadian spelling, let's have some integrity here) as I hadn't seen it yet, and lo, it was available on Netflix streaming. I was intrigued by two things about it: 1. It's another movie written and directed by Jacob Tierney (who did The Trotsky, which I love okay); and 2. It's a thriller. That stars Jay Baruchel. With a beard. In a more serious role than usual. Is that five things? 

This is the first time that I'm writing about a movie and I kind of don't want to talk about what happens in it, because it's so totally bizarre that I would rather you watched it yourself and then told me what you think. The basics are as follows: Louise (Emily Hampshire - Alexandra from The Trotsky) loves cats. Like, she really loves cats. Spencer (Scott Speedman - you know, SCOTT SPEEDMAN) is in a wheelchair following a car crash from last winter that killed his wife. Victor (you know, that Canadian guy? with the beard?) is new in town and just moving into the same apartment building as these two crazy kids. He's an elementary school teacher, and he enjoys wearing sweaters, smoking doobs, and awkwardly inserting himself into the lives of strangers. Things are tense because there is a serial killer on the loose (there is definitely a "hide yo kids, hide yo wife, they rapin' everybody" reference here), a story which Louise and Spencer are totes obsessed with. 

"Beinvenue, neighbour! Nice pillows."

Yeah...everyone in this movie is totally insane. No doubt you will figure out who the serial killer is immediately, but if you're slow, it's cool because it will be revealed to you about halfway through. Who the serial killer is is not the point at all. The point is that all of these people are batshit cray in varying degrees, and what happens when three totally batshit cray people occupy the same building space? Nothing good, I can tell you that much. This film is much less thriller/suspense than it is a character study of three sloppily fleshed out characters who make you feel uncomfortable, confused, disgusted, and also maybe a bit sad. (Jay just has that way about him #perfectcastingchoice)

Victor + this shirt = OTP

I feel like some people might be bothered (BOTHERED!) by the ending, as it's not necessarily tied up in a bow. There are still things left to ponder. There are still unanswered questions. I am not generally bothered by stories that end like this, as long as they are done well, and I believe that Jacob Tierney had a good handle on what he was trying to do. I recommend this movie to people who like crazy shit, people who like Jay Baruchel, people who like Scott Speedman, people who want to see Emily Hampshire naked, and people who like cats.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
"Nope. Not even a little bit."
"I don't know...are you thinking about cats?"


Number of scenes for which they needed to cover up Jay's maple leaf chest tattoo: Zero - it's on full display during the one shirtless (too short) scene. Also, his Celtic cross tatt on his arm. Hnnnng.

Number of times Jay did that thing, you know, where he pouts his lips and my brain explodes: 8 (either he caught on to the fact that he pouts a lot and reigned it in for this role, or the beard impedes it)

First appearance of Jay: 3 minute mark

Number of actors in this movie that were also in The Trotsky: 7

Number of scenes in which he wears that red plaid shirt: 3 (Victor must really love that thing)

Number of times you will swear that you know what's going to happen next: 8

Number of times you will be right: 7

Human body count: 4

Feline body count: 2

Rating, on a scale from one to ELEVEN: 6

Final Assessment: I will probably watch this again, hopefully with the husband. Also, Jay wears a turtleneck sweater with snowflakes on it in this thing, so...if anyone has a screencap of that you should probably email me THANKS.

You people need therapy.


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