Graphic by Steph, who is ah-MAY-zin
You know how you have a crush on someone, and then somehow the stars align, and you get partnered with them in chem lab, and you're just like, "THERE IS JUSTICE IN THIS UNIVERSE FOR NOW I HAVE A REASON TO TALK TO THIS CREATURE ON ALTERNATE TUESDAYS AND THURSDAYS FOR A WHOLE ENTIRE YEAR," but then something tragic happens, and as time goes on you realize that this creature is actually just a regular person, and that while they are quite pleasing to stare at and it makes your stomach warm to imagine sharing lunch with them on the tennis courts instead of going to class, there is also the fact that they are kind of dumb, and also they don't really like the Beastie Boys, and while you initially found it adorable that they never wear socks, now it's really starting to freak you out, like do they not own any socks, or is it a tactile thing, or do they have a freaky high body temperature or some kind of fungus situation, and also, can they quit singing the same two lines from that Mariah Carey song that you hate I mean you're ready to accidentally drop the acetic acid* on their stupid arm that is taking up space where your notebook needs to be NOTHING MAKES SENSE ANY MORE.
My point is, while I greatly enjoy Jay Baruchel, both theoretically and aesthetically, I have learned that not only is there such a thing as too much of a good thing, but also, too much of anything kind of makes you reassess why the hell you were so obsessed with it to begin with. While I still love Windows until the end of time, and Steven Karp is the most adorable college freshman to ever exist, and The Trotsky is a great movie, I have to say, I don't need to watch any more Jay Baruchel for quite a while. This was like immersion therapy for me. ALL JAY ALL OF THE TIME MAKES KRISTI SOMETHING SOMETHING. It's not you Jay, it's me. Maybe it's also actually a little bit you. I'm feeling claustrophobic. You're smothering me. It's just that...we need to see other people.
I would greatly encourage you to do a little project like this, using an actor or actress that you (think you) greatly enjoy. I'm definitely going to do this again to see if the results vary at all - are people really as interesting to watch as you think they are when they are all that you are watching?
Final Rankings, on a scale of one to ELEVEN: Fanboys - ELEVEN
Undeclared - 10
The Trotsky - 9
The Sorcerer's Apprentice - 8
She's Out of My League - 7
Good Neighbours - 6
I'm Reed Fish - 3
Just Buried - 1
Final Pout Tally: 149
Number of times the husband gave me crap for not being totally honest about how mediocre Jay Baruchel is: 6 (does this count as honesty or)
Number of interviews with Jay Baruchel I should not have watched, as it cast him in a light of normalcy that made me realize we would probably not even make good friends: 1
Other project ideas that I've had, born from this project: 3
*(I had to google types of acid, because I never took chemistry. So if my computer gets seized by the authorities and they take me in for questioning, please tell them it was all in the name of some incredibly long analogy in regards to a project where I blogged about a bunch of movies starring the same dude.)